Hi ya’ll. It’s time to blog again. If you’ve been keeping up to date on my past couple of blogs (I know you have been), then you’re well aware of the fact that I’m knee-deep in Rhyneship. In (one of) my last blogs, I talked about how Rhyneship and the Sphinx Club are a very iconic part of Wabash culture that is well-known and easily identifiable. Because of its large role on the Wabash campus, a lot of opinions get built around the traditions of the Sphinx Club and Rhyneship, and people love to share those opinions; some valid, others not. It’s time to set the record straight. I’ll admit that Rhyneship has its ups and downs, so I’ll set aside some time to address a few of both.
#RhynieProb: Jingle All the Way
Feeling socially ostracized after you sneezed loudly in the library? Try walking through the 3rd floor with jingle bells attached to your feet. You don’t know the meaning of “pariah” until some poor Rhyne has the audacity to interrupt someone’s reading session by pulling Santa’s sleigh through the “silent study” section of the library. Prepare to have all eyes shooting daggers at you.
#RhyniePerk: Dress to Impress
There’s nothing sexier than the fashion-forward individuals that make up the Rhyne class. Having your outfit picked out every day takes away massive mental pressure each morning. According to US Weekly’s fashion column,* safety orange really makes hazel eyes like mine ‘pop,’ and sandwich boards are very slimming. Everyone who’s anyone knows that gray sweats are the new plaid. Who doesn’t want an excuse to wear sweats to class every day? And if we’re not dressed in the comfiest clothing known to man, we’re sporting full suits. You may have even seen some of the Rhynes’ sexy Valentine’s Day attire last week. If you’re a Rhyne, be ready to be the fashion envy of Crawfordsville.
#BodeProb: However, I should mention that Professor Hollander informed me today that he hadn’t realized the gray sweats were a part of the Rhynie attire. People, this means others readily believe I’m the type of person who would wear matching gray sweats to class every day for no reason at all. How I’ve earned such a reputation, I have no idea.
#RhyniePerk: Basketball and Burgers
As Rhynies, we get to have cheeseburgers for dinner just about any time we want! Between cookouts, snowball fights, wrestling meets, and basketball games, we truly live the American dream of enjoying delicious, freshly-grilled burgers almost every night of the week! For free! And don’t even get me started about the basketball games. We’re talking courtside seats, baby. Think Bruno Mars was lucky to have the chance to perform at the Super Bowl halftime show? He has nothing on the Rhynie dance.
P.S. If Chet’s mom reads this, it was nice to have you at the game the other night! Always great to hear someone actually reads my blogs!!
All in all, Rhynies stay busy. But we try to have some fun along the way. Take it easy Wabash, and drive safely.
*In no way an actual citation of US Weekly