Ladies and Gentlemen, you’ve caught me on a full stomach. I just wolfed down a handsomely fried chicken breast and it was sooo dreamy. Scarlett Inn where have you been? Sometimes I wonder if Travis the chef has a master’s degree in witchcraft; black magic is the only possible explanation for the way his food makes me feel. While enchanted chicken contributed to my current merriness, I would say my good mood is also the result of being cast in the upcoming play. That’s right folks, my audition went well and I will be playing the role of Jason Chenier in Take Me Out which opens on February 20th. If you plan on attending, bring plenty of flowers to throw on stage, but please, no daisies–they give me the sniffles.
One of the things I’m looking forward to tomorrow is the presentation of my self portrait. When creating my piece, I didn’t try to accurately draw my own body, rather I tried to exploit my true nature and display it for my audience. If Roger Ebert reviewed art, he would probably give it a half star and write I don’t get it.
I’ve always been a fan of killer whales. They are the the Samuel L. Jacksons of the sea, and they take no prisoners. These are the most successful predators of the ocean, they hunt in packs of up to forty, and communicate through sound waves that travel underwater and locate their prey. In my piece I can be seen standing atop one of these beautiful specimens, perfectly balanced, walking the lethal line of being one with raw nature. I have always felt as though I were a member of the sea community, (perhaps aqua-man is my real father) hence the merman tail–no longer a little giant, I have become a little mermaid. Triumphantly, I hold a chinese rose to the heavens, offering a sacrifice for love. I call it Primal Origins.
Did I mention to you all that my class on Tuesdays and Thursdays is ART-125, aka Drawing??? For three hours I got to drift away into the realm of creativity, while fulfilling my fine arts requirement. If you cried viewing my current piece, I warn you that at the end of my semester, my work will be so great it will cause viewers to spontaneously combust. At least I hope so. Really I just want to be able to accurately draw three dimensional objects. Farewell friends, This guy has homework to do.